The Bathtub

YouTub:Baby Got Book

I don't want to step on anyone's feet by posting in place of Phylan, but I feel a certain affinity for YouTub (it being my brainchild). I thought I'd do a quick and dirty search for book videos.

 

Mayor's Weekly Address/E-Bathing: Buks R Laym

Note: If you read this post before 8 pm, you read an unfinished draft version. Sorry -- I forgot I had to finish my post. Whoops!

I don't read much, or, at all really. This is unfortunate for many reasons, chief among them that I am supposed to be writing about books this week. Don't you remember how poorly things went the last time we focused all our energy on the printed word? Or have you already forgotten the Knut Hamsun debacle of April '07? I myself have been so turned off of literature that I haven't picked up a book since that fateful week. I guess it's good that this blog is closing down soon, since apparently we don't know how to learn from mistakes. In any event, I kind of luck out here because Ebay sells a ridiculous number of books. I have chosen to focus solely on children's books published between 1900-1949. I'm hoping beyond hope that I find some sort of blog fodder here.

E-Bathing:Longer & Harder

This week I was dismayed to find that the just about the only stimulants available for sale on EBay are of a sexual nature. I'm considering a sexual harassment suit against Phylan for making me look at all this filth. The only bright side to this situation is that the 14 year old boy in me got to giggle heartily at all the stupid names people have created for their wang medications.  After the jump, ridickulousness.

EBathing: Is This Really a Sport?

According to my computer's dictionary, a sport is "an activity involving physical exertion and skill in which an individual or team competes against another or others for entertainment." (emphasis added). Normally I believe anything I read off my Mac's dashboard dictionary. However, I think that  in this instance Oxford fell short by failing to define the degree of physical exertion that is required for a game to be considered a true sport. Because of this lapse, a lot of fat, eldery and easily winded people out there have managed to sneak some games from the "hobby" category to "sports." (This means you bowlers and golfers).  EBay has half a million auctions for "sporting goods." While many of these auctions are for legitimate sports, some are for sports of a more dubious nature. After the jump, auctions for some of the fakest sports of which I have ever heard.

E-Bathing:Decorate Yourself

Many people decide to decorate the exteriors and interiors of their homes at this time of year, and some people go a little overboard with their Christmas cheer. Christmas light insanity aside, there is another craze that the holiday season inspires: holiday sweaters. There are individuals among us who take their decorating beyond the tree and actually festoon themselves in sparkly red and green raiment. (A lot of these people are moms). After the jump, a variety of holiday sweaters that will make the season bright.

E-Bathing:OMG I HEART HSM :) :) @-->---

There's this Disney movie called High School Musical that is ridiculously popular. Maybe you've heard of it? It's pretty hard to avoid since it was the highest-rated program ever for Disney when it aired, and its soundtrack went quadruple platinum.  When I was in high school, musicals were of little interest to me. This was primarily due to the fact that they were performed by a group of creepy weirdos who were not nearly as dreamy as Zac Efron, yet, sadly, just as exhibitionist as Vanessa Hudgens. Though I have never watched High School Musical, I attribute its success to children's inaccurate perceptions of the quality of actors who perform real high school musicals. After the jump, Disney takes advantage of children's gullible and commercialistic desires via EBay.

E-Bathing:Teched-up Toys

Miss Mayor got sick last week and as a result only taught for 1.5 days. That means that she has a mess to clean up when she returns to her classroom tomorrow. Also on her plate for tomorrow: 6 hours of parent-teacher conferences. That means that she has a lot on her mind, so much so that she insists on writing in the third person despite the fact that doing so is obnoxious. After the jump, the halfest-assed ebathing you ever saw.

E-Bathing:Glory to the Great EBay

I was born in the 80s and as such, I have a limited understanding of the cold war and its psychological effects on this country. What's so scary about communism? To me, Russia is just a big country filled superior gymnasts and iceskaters. I find China pretty scary, but that has little to do with their political system and more to do with their pollution. Based on some of the memorobilia I found on EBay, I'm not the only person who can't seem to muster a healthy respect or fear of communism. Check out some of the items I found commemorating Stalin, Mao, and Lenin.

E-Bathing: Battle of Who Could Care Less

I win this battle because I'm not posting for real. I'm really tired and cranky, and in no mood to string together coherent sentences about crap I found on Ebay.

E-Bathing: In a Family Way

EBay sells a wide variety of things, much of it crap. This is an obvious fact. Each week, no matter what the theme, EBay provides me with a wide assortment of items from which to choose. Most of the time, I can predict what sorts of items will pop up on my search screen.  My search this week, however, has produced a surprising grab bag the likes of which I could not have foreseen when I typed the word "family" into the search window. Check after the jump to see what "family" wonders await purchase on EBay.