Saying Goodbye, Porkham Style

A handshake? A firm emotional hug? Wishing someone all the best? No thanks, that’s how douchebags and Brits say goodbye. Rory Porkham burns bridges. Recipients of a good ole fashion Porkham farewell should consider themselves lucky if I bid them ado without a swift kick in the balls/vag. 

I have to admit that I’m pretty ashamed to have been associated with the substandard swill being offered up by my fellow Bathtub contributors. I hate to single any one person out, it was all such shit. Even worse are the loyal Bathtub readers who wasted their valuable time reading this crap. What a bunch of worthless suckers. 

I can’t believe that I left my position as the head of the New York Times editorial board for this. 

Wishing you all the worst in this new year, good riddance to the Bathtub, and go fuck yourselves everyone.

Porkham out!