The Bathtub

Rory on Rory: Return of the Rory

I’m back motherfuckers! Welcome to Rory on Rory. While I was sorry to see the end of Man on Man, I hope to capture and continue on the spirit of the former column. And by “spirit,” I mean fart jokes. In fact, the new title, Rory on Rory, with its subtle masturbatory innuendo, pays homage to Man on Man’s reference to throbbing, sweaty homosexual butt-sex.

Men in Cages: Anthropometry

I arrived at work this morning and, strangely enough, was given actual tasks to complete.  This unexpected turn of events has prevented me from producing artful prose to share with you, my readership.

To make it up to you, I'm going to do an art project that I know you'll all enjoy.  As of now, I do not have a projected time of completion for this art project, but rest assured that as soon as I finish, it will be placed on the online.

Until then, enjoy this magnificent website that allows you to create fine works of art akin to those you created in the late 80s.

Emily's Trivia Quiz: There Ain't Nothin' You Could Ask, I Could Answer You With I Won't

If you learned anything from reading my posts you know I love trivia (obvi), traveling, and foraging through my basement for old toys.  When I was younger, my family went on quite a few road trips.  And as an only child, I had to keep myself entertained in the backseat for hours--and this was before the age of in-car DVD players.  Or DVDs at all, actually.  Hell, even if they did exist when I was ten, there is NO WAY my family would have bought me that.  I can see my dad now telling me that looking out the window is more interesting anyway.  Now there's no way my kids are getting that either.  Meanwhilez, the parental units had to keep me occupied in the backseat, without me being too loud so they could hear their fave Barbara Streisand Broadway album.  What to do? Well, if you combine my loves, you get...

Shiny Happy Caitlar: Um, Really?

So I picked this theme because I thought, my goodness, there are so many different types of art, the must be so much to say. I mean, there's painting, sculpture, film, music, ceramic. There's even less "official" art forms like tattoo and fashion and interior design. Some may even consider athletes' bodies to be works of art on their own (I saw David Beckham when they came to play D.C. United and dayum he looks like Michaelangelo chiseled him). I had hoped to maybe comment on all of these different forms of art, but I just kept coming back to what everyone else has been more or less coming back to: painting.

I think the reason for my paint-on-the-brain is the fact that my office is full of art. Our head partner is very into art in general and especially likes discovering "new" artists. He often trades legal service for artwork from our clients and I think that's really cool. One particular piece that he received a few months back hangs in our main conference room and has quickly become his pride and joy. He raves at how genius it is, how romantic the theme is, how it's such an interesting piece. Now, I couldn't find a picture of the actual painting on the internet, but I did find something similar by the artist. It looks like this:

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YouTub: Will this post blend?

I've decided, after trying to write this week's post, to order and read this book. You would think looking for a bunch of performance art on YouTube wouldn't be that difficult, but the persistent (and by now cliche) "medium for the amateur" aspect quickly poo-pooed that notion. When I set out looking for performance art, I wasn't looking for people who were attention-starved and untalented enough to post their own videos of their performances, but I got about 12 pages worth. Despite this, there is some good stuff mixed in.

One Nation Under Jerome: The Art of A Bad Ad

I'm switching posting slots with the Mayor this week. But fear not loyal citizens of MacNamerica, um, she already wrote a post.  So I guess this italicized announcement is really highly unnecessay, but I just want to be consistent.

Ok, I know nothing about art.  But I know something about politics.  And the best chance us political consultants get to express ourselves artistically is through the medium of horrible television ads.  On my previous blog last campaign season, I ran a feature called Bad Ad Thursday, where I critiqued one of the zillions of terrible ads.  With apologies to Phylan for bogarting (wtf? KELLYq what does that mean?), here are three of my favorite damn bad, and consequently damn good, political ads of last cycle.

The Omniscient Omtubsman: Raining on your parade

Only one comment came to mind when looking over weather week in the Tub: it blew.

KELLYq&a: An Hilarious Prank Related To Art

I like Art. But, I also like people named Art.

Fact: Arthur is a cool, unusual name.

Fact: Art is an old-fashioned shakespeare-y verb

Fact: Art is my friend's dad and he is cool and unusual (like his name).

One time, we played an hilarious prank on Art. Graphic representation (like with pictures, not with explicit detail) is after the jump.

E-Bathing: It Really Ties the Room Together

I'm switching posting slots with Jerome this week. But fear not loyal Jeromiouxbeezoids, he'll be taking my spot this Thursday. Till then, sit tight and read my post.

To me, art is just something people put in their living room to make other people think they're classy. That is to say, people want to decorate their homes in such a manner as to convince their friends and family members that they have good taste, with "art" being an easy way to convey one's taste. And since art is so superfluous to the function of a room, it also shows that you have some amount of money for the finer things in life. Art varies widely because different people think different things are classy, with an unfortunately large group of people incorrectly believing that some truly tacky things are classy. After the jump, some suggested art purchases for some truly classy individuals.