The Bathtub: KELLYq & a: A Lessonz about Suffixerz. Seriouxbeez

Primarily my services in the tub are advice-oriented. My dual degrees in adviceonomy and adviceology have served me well lo these many weeks. However, I'll be donning a different hat for today's post: the hat of a teacher.
By now, you may have noticed that I occasionally will add ridiculous suffixes (-erz, -x, -zorz,-beez) to my words when I speak or type. I typically do this in the comments section. Lauren as well has adopted this pluralizing, suffixating lifestyle, adding "z" and "x" to many words which did not have it previously. Lauren has chronicled two seperate instances (and possibly more, though I can't be bothered to find them right now) of this bastardization of human speech. While it is generally rather humorous, it occasionally renders conversations relatively meaningless.
Many of our friends and colleagues continually mock this speech pattern (Phylan, Justin), while others (Caitlar, O.O., Jeromerz) have adopted it (to a lesser extent) in their own speech.
Today, I've made a worksheet to help you too learn the ways of bastardizing your speech patternsby adopting "modern" suffixes.. This worksheet focuses on suffixes. An answer key will be posted tomorrow! Study hard: if I notice you slacking, I will give a pop quiz. (Yes, I can do that.)

Here is the worksheet. Click it to see a full-sized version! If you're curious (read: bored) you can e-mail me your answers and I'll tell you how write you are! These are practice questions and will not count toward your grade.

I hope you found the above worksheet both entertaining and informative! Trust that, in its creation, several students were delayed in getting back their test and essays because I made this worksheet instead of grading. Whatevz, studentz! The Tub getx prioritzorzity. Until nexxxt timerz!

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